Being a Mom Takes a Village: How Do You Know If You Have One?
Everyone says it takes a village to raise children. I believe it does, but what if you don’t have a village?
What if you don’t have a group of friends or a large family that is there for you at the drop of a dime. How do you find a village that cares for your children the way that you care for them?
Is it a bad thing if you don’t have a village?
We have a small village, and I couldn’t ask for more!
My fiancé or I have never really been outgoing people. Neither of us have had too many friends growing up or making friends into adulthood. I have a few friends from high school that I keep in touch with, but would I consider them my tribe?
When I say it takes a village to raise a family, I mean people who are driving your kids all the places they need to be when you have to be somewhere else.
Someone who will get up at 2am in the morning to come and sit with you while your sleep deprived and just need someone to talk to while baby is nursing. Friends who see you having a hard time handling a meltdown and taking your baby to soothe them so you can get 5 minutes of quiet.
They’re people who know your kids like they’re their own. They know what triggers your child and what makes them happy. They will take your kids without you having to ask when they can see it all over your face that you just need a break.
You take vacations together, go out together all kids in tow. They embrace the loud and crazy times with you. Drop whatever they’re doing to be by your side when you need them the most. They bring you home cooked meals or takeout when you have a busy schedule. Coffee when it’s been a long draining day.
They will come sit with you at the hospital at midnight just to be a comfort for your toddler or come stay with your other children so you can be at the ER all night.
They ask what you need and bring you chicken noodle soup, purple Gatorade and medicine when you’re sick. I don’t mean just sick kids either, when you’re down and out and having a hard time taking care of your kids at the same time.
They’re at every one of your kids sporting events sometimes and hour or two away. They offer to pick your kids up after practices because it’s later at night and they’re closer to them so you can get home earlier. A person who will watch your other kids from 6am-8pm so both parents can drive 4 hours for their sisters soccer game or an all-day wrestling tournament.
They tag along with you when you’re out running errands just to keep you company. Go on day shopping trips with you with or without kids.
People who never miss a birthday or special occasion. Ones who show up in every aspect of your lives and never complain. They never ask for anything in return.
Ones who call you or come to see you just to see you because they miss you. They want sleepovers with the kids just because.
Take the kiddos so you can still have day dates and date nights and help you remember you’re more than Mom and Dad.
People you call family, and you trust with your whole heart to take care of your own little family.
No questions asked, they will be there!
Those are your people!
Big or small…
That is your village!
Do you have a village?
We are extremely fortunate to have a small village. Small it may be, but when we need them, they are there. No matter what time it is, where we need them or what the situation is, they show up.
If you are lucky enough to have a village in your life, be grateful! Be truly thankful for being able to give your kids more love than they could ever ask for.
Parenthood is hard and having that extra help and love is sometimes hard to find.
Find your village and never take it for granted!
2 thoughts on “Being a Mom Takes a Village: How Do You Know If You Have One?”
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Growing up I had heard this term so much but didn’t know what it meant. I used to say to myself “why does my mom need a village to raise my siblings and I? Daddy is here.” Now that I am a mom, and a mom of 3, I get it. So many times my youngest son needed to be at soccer practice the same time his twin sister had to be at dance practice. My husband was at basketball with our oldest. I had to ask for help. It would be either a soccer mom or dance mom that would jump and say “I’ll pick up” or “I’ll bring home”. Without them, someone would be late. I love my village and need them.
As they get older and getting into sports and extracurricular activities, they tend to all fall on the same days and times. Long weekends away for games and matches, you can’t be everywhere at once!